Being a writer means holding a lot of contradictory thoughts in your head and somehow getting words onto the page anyway.
Some of those thoughts are practical. Some are delusional.
Many of them contradict each other loudly and without apology.
This is a list of creative beliefs I half-hold, half-question, and fully wrestle with on any given writing day.
None of these are settled.
But all of them have been true—at least once.
Maybe twice.
Maybe yesterday.
Probably tomorrow too.
Deadlines ruin the work.
Deadlines save the work.
Intrinsic motivation isn’t enough, but extrinsic motivation feels like a burden. HALP!
The story knows what it wants to be.
The story is lying to me and cannot be trusted.
My stories are nothing without me to tell them, but they don’t always tell me how they want to be told.
Mood matters.
Mood is a trap.
Mood, vibe, whatever. It is what it is. Tell the damned story.
The first draft doesn’t matter.
If the first paragraph is bad, I will physically combust.
Me, spend a week looking at and fiddling with a first paragraph instead of getting on with TELLING THE DAMNED STORY? Certainly not.
Characters should surprise you.
Characters should obey the thematic architecture of the work.
My characters are nearly always assholes, and do what they want. Sometimes, I want to beat them with sticks.
Writing is discovery.
Writing is design.
If I can’t describe what the story is about, it’s not ready.
If I can describe it too cleanly, it’s probably boring.
Voice is everything, but if structure collapses, no-one will care how lyrical it sounded on the way down.
Writing should be hard.
Writing should be joyful.
Writing should be a quiet scream you learn to interpret as language.
Writing is stillness.
If it’s not resonant, it’s not working.
If it’s too resonant, maybe I’m just projecting again.
I don’t have answers.
But I have questions.
And more importantly, I’ve learned how to keep writing in spite of the noise, despite these tensions.
The funny thing is, that these dichotomies are all true, or true enough to be worth considering, balancing. They don’t have answers because the questions are enough.
Most days, I don’t need certainty.
I just need the next word, the next sentence, the next scene, the next chapter.